Unresolved Conflict

The non-violent communication process seeks to address conflict in a way that brings connection, empathy, and compassion. However, there are times when, though we want to resolve conflict, there is no opportunity to do so. For many different reasons, the other person may be unable or unwilling to move from a place of conflict and animosity. This leaves us with “now what?” While this scenario may be frustrating and difficult, one option available to us is to recognize that our own feelings and reactions are the only thing that we have control over. One of the things that disturb us most, is that we can’t control another person’s behavior or response. Even if we believe that what we want, to end conflict and give and receive love, is “better,” it’s not up to us to decide that this is what the other should want too. “Should” is a microaggression that stems from the inability to accept things and people as they are. Though we can see that some choices lead to harmony and deeper connections while others keep us in conflict and disconnect, our work, in some instances is to let people be free to make the choices that reflect their level of consciousness and to accept the person with love and compassion. We can accept that they are free to choose how they respond and continue to love them even if we have to do it from afar.

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